Monday, March 1, 2010

Class Participation

Once you start with your classes in a B-School you'll realise a demon you thought never existed - Class Participation. And this being a component (sometimes sizeable) of your grade only makes matters worse. I believe in the West students don't as much participate in class as much as the Professors would like. So to 'incentivize' them CP was probably made a component of their grade. Soon B-Schools around the world copy pasted this in their own curriculum.

Indian B-Schools are no different but in doing so they ignored the very critical assumption that this was based on. Indians love to hear their voices and they love their grades even more. When these 'incentives' align all hell breaks loose.

Different types of CP

1. Good CP: A good CP comprises of to-the-point meaningful contribution which would be a insight to more than 70% of your classmates. You know one when you hear one.

2. Expat CP: This CP typically starts it "When I was in the US" usually to emphasise that they are Phoren return

Prof – In the US people don’t drink bottled water not because it is safe but because it is convenient. There even tap water is safe unlike in India.

Student trying to make sure everyone knows he is Amreeka returned – Maa’m, but in Phoenix the tap water isn’t very safe!

3. Arbit CP: This CP would be a bolt from the blue. Interesting theories will be born.

Global Economics class is on and the Prof is explaining about alpha (factor of productivity) and a student asks why alpha doesn’t change and after a long discussion between the prof and the student, the student has discovered something.
Student: Sir, but alpha will change if there is a genetic evolution !!

4. Desperate CP: This CP would be born out of desperation. Usually involves asking about definition of random terms.

Prof teaching about Total Factor Productivity. Shows calculation for US in the slide.
Student: "Why about the non-Residual Labour?" (Prof stumped because student had in desperation seen Residential as Residual)

5. 'Lost in translation' CP: This would start with the intention of a very long CP which keeps drifting away and away from the discussed topic. But in the middle both the student and prof forget where it all started.

Prof: ** Discussing Fed Ex case, so asks junta to profile the man who does the buying decision in companies **
Student: He is a dumb person !!
Prof: ** signals for restraint **
Student (now calm): .. blah blah ... blah blah ... we will do this .. we will do that ...
Prof: Who is 'we'?
Student: 'We' as in the company
Prof: Ok. but you cant refer to yourself as 'we' unless you are royalty
Student (continues) : blah blah ... (after couple of minutes) .. Sir what was your question ?
Prof: *stumped* Thank you for the entertainment. Lets move on now !

6. 'I am spreading Gyan' CP: This is CP delivered like a teacher scolding kids in a way as if he would make sure you get your entire RoI from his CP.

7. Question CP: This CP returns a question for a question even if the best thing to do when a question is asked is to answer it.

Prof: (explaining game theory – first mover advantage) So what do you think you should do as the leader or the first mover in this market?

(The whole class is thinking…only one hand is flying in the air the instant the question was over)

Prof is happy (atleast one person knows the answer!!)

Prof: Yes, what do you think?

Student: Ma’am, if you are a leader shouldn’t you do what leaders do?

8. Flashback CP: This CP would go way back into history as what one had done at college / work et all.

Student: Sir, we at X & Y (Consulting Company) have random talks with our customers to tell them that they dont need what they think they need. We tell them don't worry you'll need it next year. When you'll need it we'll be there.

9. 'I am right' CP: Here the dude starting the CP will not stop unless the class bows down to him and declares him king.

Prof: So what should Coke and Pepsi do to increase market share in the world ?

Student 1: Positioning…bla bla bla…branding…bla bla…..Most importantly, I think coke should redesign its packaging, for example coke can be sold in tetra packs (similar to the Frooti Pack)

** Class bursts into laughter **

Student 2: But dude, cola drinks cannot be sold in Tetra Packs as the Fizz will go out

Student 1: Ok, then we can sell it in plastic pouches and carry bags


Strategy for getting CP chance

Before you know it you'll find yourself struggling to get the Profs attention to do that CP you wanted to do always. Just remember getting that chance / big break depends on whether you can get the Profs attention or not. Here is a valuable tip:

What you need: Fluroscent colored pen, Bright T-Shirt
What you should do: Adjust your seat height to the maximum. Lift your fluroscent pen and wave it aggressively.

1 comment:

Zeb said...

Absolutely hillarious...I totally agreebut the best one was US return's CP. there are always nuts like the one you mentioned...